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This and/or That: Batrider

Inspired by legendary rap group Black Sheep and/or our lust for Options, confusing sentence structures and/or #BASED life balancing, This and/or That is a new interview series where we put forward two (or more) options to a musical artist, leaving it wide open for them to answer in any way they see fit.

For the hymen-bursting first installment we turned to our long-time buddy/bassist Sam Featherstone from legendary grunge/punk/swamp/NewZealand band Batrider.

London and/or Adelaide and/or Wellington and/or Taumarunui?

London for the fashion, Adelaide for the cheap drinks, Wellington for the eggs and bacon, Taumarunui for the babes.

Batrider the band and/or Batrider the Defense of the Ancients character?

I have never seen or heard of the game 'Batrider'. I believe the main character was based on a short story Sarah wrote.

Carlos Santana and/or Santanana and/or Manny Santos?

Carlos Santana 'shredding' on YouTube is the best thing I have ever seen ever. Sarah is embarrassed about her singing in Santanana. Manny Santos is dead to me.

Piles of Lies and/or Lies About Pies (like when you're coerced into attending an event under the claim that they'll be serving pies and then you get there and there's nothing but Quiches)?

I tell you what, if more events sold pies, the world would be a better place. That would be HEAPS better than piles of lies. Piles of lies are the worst really. Gave me the runs.

Homie Gnomie and/or Homeboy Gnomes and/or Home Grown Poems?

Homie Gnomie is a cool dude I dated for a while in 1994. He had quite a beard on him and a tattoo of a generic Asian symbol on his crack. Homeboy gnomes are an embarrassment. Like Santanana. Like Santa.

Pink Guitars and/or Yellow Stars?

My bass line was crafted over a few years, its a style i like to call 'genius wave' (gen-w). i wrote it using a technique called 'mouthrock' which involves gently sucking the tip of the bass. Which is an oxymoron if you think about it. someone just tried to tell me that green tea is NOT magic, but it is.

The Hives and/or Absolute Boys?

The Hives are pretty good. I liked that song Hate To Say I Told You So. And Main Offender. Absolute Men.

Hand Cream and/or Tissue Paper?

Use one followed by the other. You work it out.

Hold A Grudge and/or golden era of Grunge?

Interesting fact, Hold a Grudge was originally called Hold my Fudge. But I thought that was too rude. So it went through different stages of Cold Eye Crotch, and Watch my Smudge, before we settled on the more cliched title, hoping it would bring us more commercial success. When I was a young child I was told the word 'grunge' came from the word 'dungeon', because Kurt Cobain was kept in a dungeon by the Courtney Loves and Jennifer Love Hewitt's of the industry. My dad said grunge music should be called 'dirge', which is also apt.

Jan Powers Farmer's Market and/or Jan Power foodie/broadcaster and/or and NBA Jam Power-Ups and/or Jan Power?

Look. I don't give a shit. My bass is totally rad. I'm rockin it right now. You should have seen the sweet mods I got on this bad boy. It's like every time I play it, it's screaming "hate to say i told you so', but even meaner than Howlin' Pele Hives. He sucks at bass. Sometimes I play bass wearing a suit in the mirror, just to see how sweet my moves are.

Ark d'Triumph and/or James Selwood?

James Selwood is a real man. An absolute boy. No lies.

"Untouched like a baby" and/or smiling at a stranger's baby? (I smiled at a stranger's baby the other day and the mother got angry at me)

My friend got some dirty smirks for ashing on a baby once in Sydney. Lots of people cheered at him, as if he was challenging society's prejudice against smokers, but he genuinely accidentally ashed behind his back as an elderly woman pushed a baby, somewhat "untouched" up until this point, in a pram. She was wayyyyyy to old for it to have been her baby, so what doe she care if it gets a bit ashy? Bitch.

Wagu and/or wagyu?

Wagu. He was a nice guy. His actual name is Andy. I felt embarrassed that we called him Wagu until we learnt his name. It felt racist at the time, but it had something to do with his surname or something, right? Shit. He was a REALLY nice guy...

Is there "nothing left to say" and/or "what's the point", right?

That lyric "What's the point of me and what's the point of you" from our critically acclaimed smash hit record Tara was originally sung in the style of "watttsamatta you EH?!" My favourite song/ phrase/ catch-cry since "sauce and sliced bread". The critics acclaimed that too.

You can catch Batrider playing this Saturday (August 20) at Good God as part of their current national album tour.

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